Sexual Empowerment Read online

  Youth brings with it the changing hormones. These alter life with distinct physical and mental changes in the two genders, coupled with feelings of desire. In addition, many parents seem to release their control over their offspring, which can often have questionable outcomes. Here, it becomes very important for youth to use self-discipline and realise that the desire for sex has other uses. However, youthful desires are so strong at this stage so that instant gratification from sexual intercourse is often more preferable for young ones, than the euphoria from success in the sporting or academic areas or acquiring wealth.

  In modern times the more liberated parents and educators have done their utmost to teach the young ones about the questionable consequences of this undisciplined activity. Messages about safe sex are constantly promulgated. The old adage that if you don’t think about it, it will go away is wrong. Such is the intense power of this desire, it over-rules many. Perhaps there should also be emphasis put on self-masturbation or mutual masturbation as a safety valve.

  The educators are having a positive outcome but sadly there are still those uneducated ones who remain promiscuous without any thought to the consequences. Typical are young boys who look upon the ‘power of scoring’ as a way to boost their manhood. Then there are the young girls who deem it necessary to bow down to peer pressure and be a leading light in the ‘in-crowd.’ They must be seen to ‘fall in love’ or lust without any thought of the consequences of submitting to thoughtless and unprotected sexual activity

  Other than by chemical suppression, masturbation or castration to get rid of the urge, the problem of undisciplined promiscuity with its unwanted pregnancies and diseases will never go away. It is a world-wide phenomenon. Life can be confusing for the many young people especially when various forms of the international media glamorise teenage love and some religions and cultures condone arranged marriages. There was also the case in little old New Zealand where one aspiring indigenous politician was encouraging young unmarried girls of the indigenous tribe to get pregnant and contribute to the population growth of the indigenous people. When you have role models like this, who can blame immature people for their behaviour?

  For young people, the real power and subsequent rewards of being a responsible and successful person will come from being seen to be careful about sexual activity, thus getting on with learning how to be self-sufficient in life. The desire for making money can often outdo the sex drive in a young person. If such a person is virile, such a person can have a more aggressive attitude to making money.

  Prime-time comes as the youth grows older and moves into one of the most exciting times of human fulfilment. Here, the rewards of previous controlled sexual behaviour and education start to come home. Independent people can get on with the activity of fulfilling relationships, marriage, families, careers and other beneficial social activity.

  Feminism brought with it a reversal of the roles in the lives of many. You can have the woman of the house now becoming the hunter/gatherer and the man of the house becoming the nurturer. This doesn’t necessarily mean that traditional primeval instincts go out the back door. It’s just that a more enlightened society has encouraged people to bring out and use the strengths of each other more fittingly. Youthful lust transforms to meaningful love as we move through prime-time; love becomes one of the great motivational powers. True love (intimacy, passion, commitment) shows itself in the way we express ourselves, and our natural desires.

  Parenthood, career enhancement, self sufficiency, making money and maintenance of health appear to be the priorities for most humans as we move through our thirties, forties, fifties, sixties and into our seventies. During this time a real appreciation and understanding of our sexual powers, becomes important. Sexual priorities have greater emphasis, whether it’s for pleasure, procreation, health or otherwise, as against bonking for the sheer hell of it. Enlightened people become more adept in the arts of romance, procreation, motivation and reward. It is during prime-time that we learn to disallow the desire to distract and control us. The more intelligent and disciplined people learn about and practise sublimation. They use sex as a means of empowerment.

  We now enter a time when it is more important to have power over the sexual desire trying to control us. The more enlightened among us learn about and start to appreciate the difference between the considered utilisation of one’s sexual powers as against bonking because there’s nothing else to do. Those who understand and use sexual empowerment will work smarter during their lives. Those who never understand this empowerment are destined to work harder all their lives. Here in Prime-time, ones position in the “pecking order” becomes more apparent. As time goes by, the pursuit of power starts to preoccupy many human beings, egos become more meaningful. Many will push the boundaries of relationships just to obtain position. Sexual activity can start to take a back seat while the love aspect of relationships become stronger – when this happens, love and making love become more meaningful.

  Maturity comes and the appetite will remain with males if they keep themselves fit, active and retain the desire for sex activity. The appetite remains with females but can ebb due to change in hormone balance at menopause or if their partners become fat, lazy, boring and generally unappealing. Women and men when in a secure relationship of love will view their companion as a source of pleasure and inspiration. A younger lover for a woman can be an advantage. A few do have such lovers today, gaining the reputation of ‘cougars.’ The man, while declining in physical strength on the other hand shows no major change in bodily functions, but impotence can increase for him in mid-life. Like the female, his later years can be the most rewarding with other achievements due to female inspiration. Love for one another helps both genders ensure the durability of our relationship.

  To fulfil ourselves in life mentally and physically and to acquire wealth can be a matter, in theory, of using and disciplining this appetite. This means carrying out our mental, physical and material ambitions to fit in with the physical changes in our body’s metabolism during life’s journey. In practice this is not the case, as humans weren’t born to go through the sexual stages of life under such regimentation. This is a period of life when you may have used all your second chances and you have either made it or you haven’t.

  Depends what you mean by ‘making it’ in life. Many say money, but the majority appreciate that having quality of life, happiness and stature is what it’s all about; with that comes power. The appetite for making love may wane but the desire and love for one another will always be there. More often than not, it is expressed in simpler ways; such as holding hands or just playing the role of the romantic. The desire may be transcended by a deep and meaningful love, which is stronger and will last a lifetime. Making love is not always necessary but if you have spent your life dissipating your natural desires and your fortune, you probably won’t have the power that comes with maturity; you could become a nuisance and an embarrassment to your family. Sexual empowerment is still with you. What you can’t do in a physical sense, you can make up for in the mental and emotional areas with the display of intelligence, wisdom, verbal motivation and encouragement. On the physical side of things, you can still be the mentor.

  So, when interacting with the other gender, one should consider the other person’s body clock. She should consider his age and realise the younger he is, the more he may be sexually inclined whereas the older he is, the more he may be concerned with money and status. He should consider her age. The younger she is, the more her self-interests may centre on procreation, the older, the more she may focus on security and financial independence.

  Sexual Sublimation

  Sexual activity comes with moral responsibilities and requires ethical behaviour. One only has to look at backward cultures, religious extremism and government decree to realise the havoc that frustrated sexual appetites inflict upon society. Sexual freedom has always gone in cycles. The most recent repressors of sex and women are the Churches during
the last 2000 years. Prior to publication, one well- known mainstream religion, the Roman Catholic Church had settled legal claims arising from years ago because of the sadistic behaviour and molestation activity of a few of its clergy. Their actions had arisen because of their sexual dysfunction and official repression. Many cultures and religions discriminate against women.

  In parts of Somalia and in many other parts of the world, female circumcision is still practised. The Arabian cultures are renown for their enforcement of different dress styles and codes of conduct for women,– they must wear Burkas- –they must be chaperoned, they must not be seen with an unmarried man, while the ruthlessness and brutality of the Taliban in their treatment of women causes concern. The Anglican Church allowing women to be ordained as priests or even bishops was a major breakthrough last century.

  In many cultures the prevailing attitude has been against investigating one’s sexual desire for the healing and motivational effects it can have on one’s physical and mental capacities. Also, since time immemorial, the aging process has been burdened with the belief that making love should be dispensed with and older folk left to spend their time being role models of good behaviour. They should be good grandparents, play bowls, bridge, golf, knit for charity, join committees and set a chaste example to the children. In other words, it was not done for ’oldies’ to indulge!

  What a lot of codswallop! Since the early twentieth century, we are getting fitter and healthier than we ever were before. There are options of treatment to check the aging process. Read Catherine Mayer’s book, Amortality. The Pleasures and Perils of Living Agelessly. See what she has to say about seniors and their Viagara fuelled sexual revolution. In December 2010, Hugh Hefner of Playboy fame proposed to Crystal Harris. He was 84 years of age and she was 24 years of age.

  However, we have a responsibility throughout life, to use sex for the positive powers it provides. If you can understand and harness positively the power of your primeval instincts, your sex drive, then your journey to success will be made easier.

  If you have a happy relationship with a good love life - you will be less stressed, more engaged and generally have a more balanced outlook on life. A good relationship brings a settled and focussed mind, so important to positivity and acquiring wealth.

  Taken a step further, if in your day-to-day business activities you can adapt your people skills and your sales and marketing strategies to empathise with people’s primeval instincts by using your erotic capital, then you will have the world at your feet.

  The Priority of Passion

  With age and maturity comes knowledge and power, and the ability to practise what was referred to as Sex Transmutation by Napoleon Hill in his classic book, Think And Grow Rich. The book was written over half a century ago in less liberated times and perhaps the meaning of Transmutation was not explained and elaborated on by the author as openly as it would be in the modern day society. It is more accurately described as a self-discipline enabling you to transmute your sexual energy to a more powerful force. The proper application of this discipline enables a person to transfer the passion for the pleasure of sex into a passion for more constructive endeavours. These are often the creative pursuits and endeavours that you can really get passionate about - such as those mentioned earlier - arts, sport, making money, politics, raising a happy family or whatever takes your fancy.

  Those who achieve great things in life put a priority on their various passions and concentrate on the things that will get them places in life. They know sexual activity will consume time, calories, resources and mental effort that could be better spent on achievement and making money.

  The result of sublimation is a gradual acquisition of absolute power over circumstances around you. You learn how to influence these circumstances for your greater benefit. Instead of giving in to the desire for intercourse, you become more adept at transmuting the temptation and using intercourse as a reward. Careers are made or broken through the application or non-application of this discipline. A retail organisation this author knew about had a management executive who was brilliant at his role and widely respected for it. However, his personal life told another story with his extra-marital shenanigans within the organisation causing displeasure and mistrust amongst his peers. His peers were fairly conservative, happily married and excellent role models in business and society. Because of his behaviour, they denied him the prize he sought, the ultimate aphrodisiac; power from a seat on their board.

  Using your sexual genes – erotic capital - for empowerment creates a total revolution of your mental capacity. It helps awaken your intuitive abilities to know and to understand a great deal more than is presently possible. It gives you a better perspective and lets you develop a better sense of control around your environment. Once you understand and control the abiding forces of sex, only then will you benefit from such a philosophy of sexual empowerment.

  Erotic Capital

  At this point, it is important to understand that we all have inherited four types of Capital; Social Background, - the use of resources that accrue to a person from membership of groups or networking around relationships, Cultural Heritage - our work experience, information resources and assets that are socially valued due to our education and knowledge of arts, literature and music; Economic Status – the economic environment we inhabit that enables us to make money and accumulate financial resources and assets. Having the above types of capital comes down to being born in the right environment, with the right parentage, being well educated and perhaps, having been born with a silver spoon in ones mouth! What you haven’t got by birth, you can usually acquire through natural ability, education, social climbing and luck.

  However, not all of us recognise our inherited sexual genes create the fourth type of inherited capital, Erotic Capital. It has varying degrees of six elements that eventually create the personal magnetism or X-factor within us. Erotic Capital is the Millennium interpretation of the economic value and power of our Sexual Attributes. Just as we are born with basics levels of health, intelligence and talents, so are we born with a level of undeveloped Sexual Power. This comes down to the social and economic impact we can make by using our inherited but latent Sexual genes. This in itself implies that such a use of sexual genes has an economic value, as well as an emotional value. It does, it has both. In Chapter 3, Erotic Capital, we show you exactly how and why the power of Erotic Capital or what is really Sex Appeal, can affect our lives for the best.

  Many have it in huge quantities as evidenced by the quality and quantity of their successful and flamboyant lifestyles. People such as Sean Connery and Pierce Brosnan playing the part of James Bond or Tina Turner as she strutted her stuff in the spotlights as do Rihanna and Lady Gaga. Many of course through ignorance or by choice, place no value on their sexual abilities. This is very sad as it amounts to a complete ignorance of one of life’s most precious gifts, our inherited sexual genes. An analogy showing the extremes of human nature demonstrating the use of erotic capital can be seen by the way the Taliban treat their women as against the way women are treated in civilised western cultures.

  It is accepted that females have more erotic capital than males because they work harder at creating and maintaining beauty, style and social acceptance. Men on the other hand used to be more relaxed about it. In recent years, there has been an upsurge in attendance of men at gymnasiums and in the pursuit of other relevant things (buying cosmetics, greater interest in fashion etc) pertinent to male erotic capital. Perhaps men are catching up here!

  In summation, the positive development and enhancement of ones erotic capital to generate empowerment is gaining momentum in society. This is demonstrated in the mating and marriage practices but also in other social interactions in day-to-day living and in big business. So, Erotic Capital becomes the basis of this book.

  Sexual Empowerment

  We are all sexual beings and it’s how we emphasise this that enables us to get more from life. Clever people kno
w how to use their sexual powers for their own betterment. This comes down to recognising sex (sexual intercourse) for what it offers and does and sexuality (our thinking and action processes) which allow us to create our X-Factor. See Chapters 3 and 5.

  Sexual Empowerment is the art of cultivating our sex appeal coming from our inherited sexual genes -our Erotic Capital- to create an aura of success about ourselves, that enhances our winning edge in our relationships. The millennium executives may call it charisma, others refer to it as ‘showing attitude.’

  So, as we enter the new millennium we see big corporations running the world. The people involved in them are being encouraged to compete with each other. Here, your considered and disciplined use of Sexual Empowerment is an aspect of human nature that must be understood and utilised constructively.

  If you cultivate your inherited sexual genes to portray the six components of erotic capital, then the empowerment arising will give you a more competitive edge as you strive for fame and fortune.

  Chapter 2

  Sex: The Physical Action

  Sex is important! Sex is profound! Sex is funny!

  CYNTHIA HEIMEL, Sex Tips For Girls 1983

  The Sex Revolution

  Once regarded as unmentionable, a marital right and a privilege, sex as a result of the Sexual Revolution of the Swinging Sixties is now out of the closet. It is recognised as a necessary part of everyday living. The more informed you are about using the motivational powers of sex, the richer your life will be. Perhaps in the early nineteen-sixties, the media publicity in England given to the novel, Lady Chatterley’s Lover and to The Profumo Affair was the start of the revolution, or one of several catalysts that caused people to question and rebel against old-fashioned values.