Sexual Empowerment Read online

  Things such as the Profumo Affair combined with the birth control pill becoming more reliable brought out in the open, a more liberal view of sexual activity. The views came from extroverted singles, enlightened married couples, feminists, hippies, commune members, authors, the sex industry, free-speaking academics, the medical fraternity, nudists, rock artists, pop stars, film stars, and other proponents of the joy and art of sex. The pill enabled women to rebel against old-fashioned practices and traditions. The sight of a worn out mother, aged before her time, sitting in the doctor’s waiting room with her malnourished children ended. The nuclear family was here. The pill freed up women’s wishes and liberated them sexually.

  The dolly birds of London’s Carnaby Street and the hippie chicks of Haight-Ashbury in San Francisco typified the new age of sexual enlightenment. They were at the vanguard of the baby boomers, the generation who benefited and contributed most to the sexual learning curve. They were passing through adolescence and reaching maturity when the new age of sexual enlightenment occurred. The songs of the times underscored the liberalism of changing attitudes in society. The lyrics of Elvis Presley, Johnny Cash, Tom Jones, Engelbert Humperdink, the Beatles, the Rolling Stones and others created controversy and fashioned the attitudes of many modern day sexually enlightened people.

  Extroverted sexual expression and activity was here to stay. It was not without mistakes. Lessons were learnt and many paid the consequences such as contacting Aids and other sexually transmitted diseases. Many reaped the rewards, such as less frustration in relationships and more openness in the commercialisation of sex. Gradually we moved from being embarrassed about sex into a more enlightened society, which makes the most of sex.

  A more sophisticated version of the cartoon over appeared on the Internet during 2006. Perhaps it’s also a good analogy of changing sexual attitudes. What it doesn’t show according to the media, allegedly demonstrated by Paris Hilton and Britney Spears in late 2006 is the commando look, the need for no knickers. But knickers for her always provide security and for him, her mystique.

  Sex: The Physical Action

  PROOF OF GLOBAL WARMING

  The Need for Sex

  Sex is all about your survival, your physical, mental and economic well-being. People indulging in a satisfying sexual relationship will usually achieve more out of life. This is because they have learnt to discipline their desires for the right person, time and place. By putting sexual energies into a loving relationship, it keeps their minds on the main chance, the easy street to riches.

  An enlightened person will realise sex is high up in the priority scale of human needs. If it doesn’t teach you to relax then nothing else will. Properly practised, it is the climax of true love between two people. Regular sexual activity within a loving relationship enhances up your mental powers of concentration. You will be emotionally and physically more focussed and will work smarter. If you are not getting it regularly as they say, you will understandably become frustrated, and your mind will wander during the day. Furthermore, you are likely to be wasting money and dissipating your mental energies on things not conducive to obtaining your goals in life. Such is the power of sex.

  The American, Laura Snyder, of Fun Online Corporation in her paper on ‘5 Reasons Sex is Good For You’, writes about the physical benefits of having a satisfying sexual relationship. With Procreation being taken for granted, she highlighted five great advantages of sex:

  1) Exercise, You are getting a good workout - Sex keeps you fit, helps keep your body in good condition. Regular sex which burns approximately 150 calories per half hour, is regular exercise. The more you do it, the more fitness your body retains.

  2) It keeps you in good health - You won’t get sick. Snyder reported that according to Dr Carl Charnetski, Professor of Psychology at Wilkes University and co-author of Feeling Good is Good For You, people who reported one or two sexual encounters per week enjoyed higher levels of Immunoglobulin A, an anti-body that fends off illness. (Recently a view has emerged that a man’s active sex life can keep prostrate cancer at bay).

  3) You will feel happier - It’s a boost to one’s sense of satisfaction and creates greater security in a relationship, thus a greater sense of wellbeing. You become more enthusiastic about life. Researchers at the State University of New York in Albany found that women who regularly came into contact with semen were significantly less depressed than those who didn’t get a dose of those potent sex hormones and naturally occurring opiates.

  4) It reduces stress - Snyder wrote that people who get sex regularly reported they handled stress better. The release of the climax will get even the most anxious lover totally relaxed and enable better sleep.

  5) You will live longer (and look younger) - Snyder reported that a British study of 1000 men found that those who had at least two orgasms per week had half the death rate of those who indulged once a month. Sex can make you look younger too, according to neurophysiologist David Weeks who found that men and women reported having sex an average of four times per week looked approximately 10 years younger than they were.

  In addition to Snyder’s summary, the proper use of sex can serve as the foundation of success in life. Many proponents of the joy and art of sex agree on its importance to boost self-esteem. The proper harnessing of one’s sex drive and sex appeal is important when it comes to the development of one’s self-esteem or in simple terms, one’s ego. A person with a good ego/self-esteem usually has a settled mind and a settled mind is important when you are engaged in the pursuit of achievement and in making money.

  If we consider Laura Synder’s point about living longer, it is logical that anything keeping you in good health or motivating you on to a more positive way of living, is going to encourage you to live longer and will ensure you do live longer. Active participation in sexual activities contributes to the attributes needed to keep the human body in great shape. As the old saying goes, ‘all work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy’.

  The media in New Zealand - The Press, Christchurch, in April 2006 – ran a story on its front page under the headlines: ‘Surprise; sex is good for you’. The journalist, Joanna Davis reported in this story that if you need an excuse to have more sex then here it is. She went on to write: ‘Not only will a vigorous workout beneath the sheets help you shed weight, it could also help ward off colds, heart disease and depression. And if that is not enough to get you hightailing it back to bed, sex can - somewhat surprisingly - also lower your blood pressure.’ The journalist further reported that Stuart Brody, professor of psychology at the University of Paisley in Scotland, looked at sexual activity and changes in blood pressure when volunteers were stressed by being asked to speak in public or do mental arithmetic. Even taking into account pre-existing levels of anxiety and neuroticism, volunteers who had sex were less stressed, and their blood pressure returned to normal faster than others. And the effects can endure for at least a week. Brody guessed the release by both partners of the so-called ‘love hormone’ oxytocin accounted for the calming effect.

  The journalist went on to write that it seems that sex does do wonders for your health. In recent years, researchers have found that sex improves sense of smell, posture and bladder control; that the hormones released are effective pain relief for headaches, migraine and even arthritis; and that erection problems in men could aid health by acting as a red flag for high blood pressure, high cholesterol or diabetes. An energetic bout of sexual activity is also thought to be the exercise equivalent of 15 minutes on the treadmill.

  You only have one body and the ability to repair it or source spare parts for it, is not very easy, economic and sometimes totally impractical. As the renowned United States motivational speaker Dennis Waitley did suggest, you should treat your body like a Ferrari motor-car; it should be kept in pristine condition by means of positive thinking, good food, exercise and sleep.

  Perhaps modern day motivators who think outside the square will remember Dennis Waitley’s words and always suggest that a happy sex life full of love is a vital requirement for a sound mind, good health, a good body and a full wallet.

  Sex will ensure you keep stimulated about living life. With the increasing tendency towards one-night stands, casual affairs and other sexual sporting exercises, the true purposes of procreation, motivation and reward are often overshadowed. Short-term reward after the thrill of the chase is often the modern reason for making love, as it is called in the right circles. The real emotional value from sex comes from bonding a strong, happy and loving relationship that satisfies, enlightens and motivates one. The sex activity becomes an important reward within that relationship.

  Obviously an unhappy relationship leads to a lack of sex. This can lead to lethargy, depression, irritability, stress, frustration, overuse of drugs and alcohol, displays of temper, a breakdown in human relationships plus a host of other human disorders. Overdoing it can also lead to human disorders such as aids, venereal diseases and a breakdown in human relationships all requiring medical attention.

  A relationship without some type of sexual expression can be one where there is no icing on the cake, no reward, no incentive to achieve within that relationship and probably no romance within that relationship. The partners may lose interest in each other and may begin to look elsewhere. A wise person will make the effort to stimulate the relationship, to keep it alive.

  A balanced love life with a loving partner leads to the ultimate aphrodisiac in life, power. Many United States Presidents are examples of such a lifestyle.

  The Female Power Base

  Women are born with an inner strength, the power to bear pain. The necessity for this power is part and parcel of giving birth. However, this is not without reason. A thinking woman will ensure that if she is t
o produce children, she will do it with the most suitable and virile male she can find and she should use her sex appeal to do so. This is all part of her power base, and the way she uses this is part of her mystique. If she does so with care and consideration, she will also boost her self-esteem in the process.

  Man discovered the existence of the future albeit with the prospect of death in waiting. Consequently he longed to do something for which he would be remembered. In historical times producing a son would be part of his immortality. Immortality has often been studied and sometimes sought by man, mainly to prolong life; but the best he can do, is to form the basis of a powerful dynasty. This is often one of his greatest ego boosts. Other areas are academic, sporting, financial or some other form of success and the recognition and power that goes with it. Producing a dynasty can be an ego boost to a man. Any woman who understands this and knows how to positively exercise her inherent power, in which the male seed was nurtured can influence and master the most powerful of men. She will become the nurturer of him. Take note of the many political, business and academic leaders inspired by a woman - such as Napoleon, Churchill, Kennedy, Onassis, Clinton, Branson and Obama. As time went by primeval women realised the significance of their monthly cycle in relation to childbirth but men took a lot longer to realise such a phenomenon. The ancient belief was that women provided a garden in which the male seed nurtured. Once the connection was made, the pattern of human breeding changed forever. Knowing the implication of her menstrual cycle, the female gained immense power and enormous responsibility - the power to pleasure or not pleasure a male and the responsibility of motherhood.

  The primeval female’s greater power was her knowledge that her reproductive system was geared to the phase of the moon, that at Full Moon she would bleed and that during that phase of the moon’s orbit she was likely to conceive. Simply put, the theory was that during times of no moon, the man would stay at home waiting for the right signal. This came during half moon, her time of ovulation - when she was receptive to sexual activity. Then at full moon, the man was sent out hunting, to bring back the red meat to restore the iron she lost due to menses. What sets women apart from other mammals is they have the facility to be receptive, irrespective of their cycle. However, they vary where this is concerned.

  Thus, the female’s primeval instincts encourage her to look for a provider who can provide provision, protection and companionship. The higher up the power scale a male is, the more likely her natural instincts tell her, that he will have these abilities. But, does her power base diminish with the onset of later years when childbearing due to menopause is over? No! The later years are when the woman can really excel in the nurturing and motivation area. Passing on the benefit of her experience and wisdom, so ensuring her own self-worth is recognised while ensuring there is growth in the family tree.

  The Male Power Base

  The male power base lies around the mystique he can create about his ability to provide. What he does and has counts, but more importantly, the impression he creates about such action, is what will attract attention from the interested female.

  In prehistoric times and even medieval times, men literally threw themselves at women in an undisciplined way to engage in intercourse. Then, a stone age man had to prove himself worthy of manhood, his hunting skills, (coming back to the cave with some form of trophy such as an elephant tusk) had only to start menstruating and she was accepted as a woman. So it is today, modern man still has to provide the trappings of success, to prove himself worthy of his manhood. The more in her eyes he has the power of provision, the ability to give her the security she needs, the more likely he will be worthy of her lovemaking and nurturing abilities. Irrespective of women’s liberation, a man who can provide the trappings of wealth will be more attractive to a woman than a no-hoping macho man who lives the life of a couch potato.

  In the animal world, livestock breeding is often based on pedigrees. Here the idea is that the more perfect the bloodlines of the male and female to be matched in breeding, the better the offspring, This logic is often applied to the human race through ensuring the each partner has suitable genes to ensure the preservation of human bloodlines within certain sectors of society. In many parts of society, this continues under the guise of match making and in other cultures with pre-arranged marriages that ensure bloodlines prevail, fortunes are kept in the right hands and dynasties continue. This is the theory but more often than not, is the exception. As civilisation has become better educated and more interested in the rewards of civilised living, i.e. money, the more important money has become. Men must ensure they have plenty of it and many men with big egos usually have the confidence to acquire such money.

  Simply, the power base for a man becomes his ego, which must have sufficient thrust to ensure he has the ability to provide security and love. For him, the ability to provide is summed up by one word, money. For her though, it’s more a matter of being given security and love. The more wealth making ability the male has, the greater his power base and appeal to the female of the species at the start of a relationship. The relationship will endure if there is love within it.

  Sadly there is plenty of evidence today to show that she will go for the money irrespective of the consequences. Sometimes a woman’s primeval need for security can be so great, it can over-rule the rationality of her choice. Divorce courts are the tangible evidence of this fallibility within human nature. However, what brought this outcome about in the first place was often his need for sex. He is perpetually primed for sex and the knowing woman can take advantage of this. The real power goes to a man who can control his sex drive through putting a priority on his various passions.

  Who Has The Power?

  When it comes to motivation and reward, who has the power to make things happen sexually? If a couple have been mutually indulging in some foreplay over a period of time things will happen. However, when it comes down to sexual intercourse, more often than not nature takes its course and the one with the greatest urge at any one time instigates the activity or it can be mutual.

  Since the dawn of civilisation the mighty hunter has tried to conquer all before him; fellow man in his way, the elements, the planet’s predators and the gods. He does this with the objective of returning home in triumph with the fruits of victory. Here he is to wallow in the adulation of his woman and enjoy her attentions. Nevertheless, she may have ambitions other than pleasing her man. Her natural role of motherhood may mean more to her than massaging the conqueror’s ego.

  As already discussed, the natural function of reproduction is one of women’s greatest powers; so motherhood is perhaps her greatest drive. Despite this, many new age women seem to be caught up in a view that putting off having children is a great advantage. It enables them to achieve more in their career paths. But does it? Does the female nature really get over-run by this new millennium attitude? This line of thinking has not yet permeated through several generations of people to provide a valid answer. As the old seers suggest, a woman is never fulfilled until she has produced a child. A woman’s ambitions may vary at any one time. A woman who controls her sexual instincts, understands her natural menstrual cycle, can influence any hot-blooded man’s attempt to manipulate her.

  Animals clearly show evidence of ovulation, the time of conception whereas humans do not. Some female animals will develop a smell about themselves and have a swelling of the outer genitals and proudly display it to a male to encourage the mating process. This is commonly referred to as the time when such an animal is ‘on heat’. In human beings, scientists have found that women go into heat just like every other female mammal, they have a flashpoint. In September 2004, the International media reported courtesy of the AAP, that research based on brain scans showed women respond more dramatically to pictures of nude men when they tare ovulating i.e. on heat. Writing in the science journal, Human Reproduction, Juan Tarin and Vanessa Gomez-Piquer of Spain’s University of Valencia said……